Just a quick Justin update, I am dealing with things a lot better the last few days and it gives me hope that I can have more days like this. I still however for the life of me cannot sleep unless it is medically induced, for instance last night, I took 2 Lunesta's at 8pm and I slept until Four Am... so I took 2 more, I slept until 6:30am so I took another 2 and I slept until 1:45pm... I know it sounds rather unhealthy but it is the best sleep I have had in a very long long time and I had not a single dream ( The things I dream about make sleep not worth it)Thank goodness I woke up feeling drunk but it was worth it.
This is what I really wanted to talk about... last week I was at a party with about 20 semi close friends and was the normal talking and "How are you?'s" and one person asked "where have you been?" I preceded to tell them about moving back and forth from Arkansas to Missouri to Arizona then back to Arkansas/Missouri. He gave me a look that had to be one of my favorite looks I have ever received, His eyes got really big and he started saying "WOW!, WOW!" I could only guess how crazy he thought the things I was saying were, and tried so hard not to let his face show (sorry bud, caught ya, and I will remember that look the rest of my life) after he finished nodding he said "Well I guess your just a drifter Justin!" I didn't know how to respond to it, at first I was offended when you think of a "drifter" you think of someone who is homeless and hops on trains or hitch hikes to get around... but after a second I realized, I am homeless (I have a home I just choose not to live in it.) , I have been drifting from state to state in my own car but still... I have slept on a sex stained/ cigarette burned couch found in a dumpster for 3/5 months in 2009. So instead of shunning that name put thrown my direction I have choosen to accept it, and instead of thinking of it in a negative way I will just add it to my long lists of Justin Stein adventures, and my adventures are what keep me going in life, I love them and creating them... they make me unique and different from the other people my age, and I do not want to be like them, I want to be Justin Stein. Plus, one day I will not be able to do this, I will have a family and children and I can't just uproot them or leave them... one day I am going to want to be in only one place with the people/person that I love... It's not that time for me right now... So I say this this to you to tell you I will be drifting again for the summer... I know that I said that I was going to stay in Joplin for the summer but I will not... I am on the move again, after really thinking about it, the only reason I wanted to stay in Joplin was to stay as close to Andria as I could, but the closer I am to her the more pain that it causes me... So, I joined a fishing crew off the coast of Alaska and I will be heading out in 2 weeks...(I am willing to bet after some of the things you I written on here you semi believed that last sentence.) I am going to Arizona for a Job oppurtunity working with under-priviledged kids, plus my my parents are moving so I thought I would be a good son... and help them pack up all my child hood memories. They know as well as I that I will be gone as soon as summer is over and that I will be in California likely by December. I am a drifter, I will continue to embrace that and it is going to take one hell of a net to catch me and make me stop. I hope all is well in your lives, and that you will continue your prayers for me.
I would love to hear what you think of my blogs, or if you have any opinions you can feel free to contact me at...
Justin Stein
futuremlbplayer2008@yahoo.com
or
806 s emerson st
chandler, AZ 85225
